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My life

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As a man I'm supposed to be strong and just get on with things not get to down about stuff. Each day I try but each day is wearing me down gradually. This time of year really sucks because you're supposed to be happy as it Christmas but not in my life. I like seeing good folk smiling getting ready for Christmas. I just wish that was my life. I walk by homes each day seeing beautiful decorations and trees in windows wishing that was my life. I've tried to get that life but somehow at 43 I feel that life has now passed me by. I sit each day in my cold rented house with little food in my fridge or cupboards wondering what I've done wrong to end up like this. I worked hard all my life till I lost my job 5 years ago. Since that day I stayed positive that I'd get another job and I'd be ok again. But that just has not happened. See I've applied for 1000's of jobs in the last 5 years and nothing has come of sending cv's. Am I now at only 43 unemployable I feel I must be. Christmas 2017 it seems now is just going to be another lonely one for me. Here is hoping 2018 is kinder
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